By Valerie Solomon, Busy Mom Gets Fit

How many days a week do you think about changing your body?

It’s 7 isn’t it?

Seven days. 365 days a year.

Even when you eat well...

Even when you exercise...

You think there must be something you should do better.

Drink more water.

Eat more protein.

Eat a different protein.

Eat more plants.

Eat less of that. Eat a little more of that.

I’ll be honest with you… I took this picture of myself thinking I’d write a post about loving yourself and your flaws. I thought I’d get a picture of all of the flaws I’ve been “seeing”. Not clear skin, nappy hair, soft arms, soft belly, dimply butt and thighs.

Then I looked at the picture and thought….

Damn. What is wrong with me? I look fine! OK! Great! Fit.

This happens so often with my clients, too. I get a message from them in which they express how they want to change something about their body and their frustrations about where they are physically.

I’ve learned to ask for a progress picture because, usually, what I will see in the picture is not what they see. I see healthy, strong, fit.

They see something that needs to change. The same image I love of them, is putting them in a negative state everyday.

So why are we telling ourselves everyday we need to change something?

Why are we creating unnecessary negative energy for ourselves?

Here’s why, I think.

We are driven women in all areas of our lives.

We want to do well in our careers.

We want to improve our relationships.

We want to be great mothers.

We are thinkers, and grinders, and hustlers. We know we’ve got more to give and we want to give it our all.

But to do better in these areas doesn’t require a negative energy internally like wanting to improve our bodies often does.

Why can’t we approach taking care of our bodies in the same way as being a good mother or friend? ...Just gently trying our best everyday… or just being ok with things as they are most days too?

When I was competing in fitness competitions, pushing my body hard 5-7 days a week, I was in a better headspace about changing my body than I am now. I saw it as a fun project just to see what I could do.

Now, I’m just hard on myself if I feel like I could be doing better. Grinding harder. Making better food choices. There aren’t too many days where I feel like I tried my best. (Is it because we have a past as an athlete? Our standards are high for what we know we are capable of. But is just enjoying a healthy and fit life enough now?)

There are very few days where we are ok with things as they are.

7 Days of wanting change. 365 days a year.

What if, for just one day, we didn’t try to change or think about changing anything.

What if for one day, we were just ENOUGH.

Enough already.

Just imagine what we could do with all of the new positive energy and contentment?

“Focus on what you want your life to look like—not just your body.” ~Sarah Failla

I love this quote, and it brings me to 3 questions to ask yourself:

Is your body allowing you the mobility and strength to live the lifestyle you want to live?
Are you strong and healthy?
Are you doing things to take care of your body consistently?

If you answered ‘yes’ to these, you are there! It’s in our nature to want to strive for more, but let’s be kind to ourselves and enjoy the healthy bodies that we have along the way.

And let’s be done with the questions:

Are you perfectly unattainably unsustainably lean?
Do you look like a fitness model perfectly photoshopped, posed well, airbrushed, and dehydrated when you wake up?
Are you that weight you were that time 10 years ago when you were your lightest but you were going through that stressful situation, weren’t strength training, and actually weren’t that happy?

I hope the answer is always ‘no’ to these questions, and I hope you can smile at how absurd they are!

If you are struggling with negative body image, check out this free video series to help.